i was clicking through a couple of my post fromm when i started this blog... and i noticed some changes.
i use to blog about anything, random, happy to be exact.
things that i believe its happy and worth sharing and constantly be reminded of. however, the more recent the post is the more.."not as happy" it is...
it seems like ive been blogging when ever i feel down or something bad has happened...
this post is not much differnt...
although im a little dissapointed at that but.. this can be a last. maybe from this post onwards i can blog when ever im on the happier end of the scale.... not jus the other end.
it seems these couple of days i keep having the urge to blog. it seem like regardless of what happens (small or big things) the first thing i can think of is to blog it...
i wonder why really.. is it because they are precious memories worth rembering? worth nothing down. or is it just that they are considered as meaningful to a certain extent. that i really don't know. all i no is.. i want to blog. even the slightest thing. however the one medium i can use - FB i tend to aviod.
prob because i know for a fact taht everyone will know/see but then again im probly jus someone that pops up outta nowhere once in a while. so random and infrequent that wen my name does appear they would know notice at all ans skip pass it.
recently i tried getting back on track with things, study.. and friends. but not doing a good job in either areas.
study wise.. im still leaving things till last minute. everytime i finsh one assingment/work last minute and feeling bad about it i tell myself to stop doing that, esp not for the next one. yet that still hasnt change. after what? 1.5yrs of uni.. im still doing it...
friends wise. i pormised tiff to sleep over at her place mroe now that her mum went overseas. im not sure has her mum came back yet but i still have not slept over at her palce. i still have not visited her new work place. i still have not done what i should as a bestfriend/sister to her. i didnt keep the promise.
not only to tiff but to another. but in a way i tried. i thought as long as i tried to keep to the prmise things would/may go well but it was not the case.
in return.. i got nothin i n return. i got turned down and pushed away. and knowing taht it is the end. for sure this time.
there may have been more the once i said this however everytime taht i thought itd be the end my "friend" proves me wrong.yet this time is it this "friend" that tells me for certain "this is it".
on the other hand. maybe my urge to blog is because this time i realise this blog is one of the one thing i can turn to as i go through my ups n downs.. like a rollercoaster ride.
well after the slow uphill im finally on the mega-drop. and still dropping...
i shall try blog more often now, on anything. not jus when im helpless and lost. im not too sure will this work but i guess its worth a try.. right?...
well good luck to me. and as a start...
i finished my presentation!!!! the last of this sem before the final exams.. though i got a feeling i'll have to repeat the two psy subject but maybe if i just try a little harder starting from now maybe i can change that. well i told myself to start today. but... i ended up lookin at jewelries =P hehhehe
i'll start tommo morning.. and for now.. this post is long enoughh...
Chheeers~
PeePee
what we could have been, 7:02 AM.